Wednesday, August 11, 2010

She Had Dumps Like a Truck...


“She had dumps like a truck, truck, truck

Thighs like what, what, what

All night long….Let me see that thong…”
---Sisqo, Thong Song


I want a dumps like a truck and thighs like what.

I want a “thong-worthy” ass.

First of all, I wasn’t born with a nice firm, booty. Being Asian/Mexican, you think my chances of getting a nice, round full ass were in my favor.

*SIGH*

Unfortunately, God decided to give me the Asian, barely there, booty and the Latina hips and thighs…damnit! I wish we could reverse the two! I’d love to have no hips and thighs with a delicious ba-donk-a-donk.

And these thighs…are you kidding me?

It didn’t help that I started gymnastics at an early age. That just added to the bulk of these stems. And guess what happens when you grow up and stop your gymnastics workout? Yup…those thighs become jell-o. Then the weight fluctuations come and go and that’s when the lovely cellulite decides to set up camp starting from your inner thighs and slowly take over the rest of the outer thigh campsite. But the Cellulite family gets lonely, so they invite over the Stretch Marks. The Stretch Marks are a busy bunch. They love to hang out on the hips and stomach. They love to make long, lovely roads from your stomach to your belly button. They’re a committed family and will be with you ‘til the day you die. Comforting, right?

When guys started to refer to my junk as appealingly “thick” instead of fat, I started to think twice about rejecting my body. If you can’t have what you want, then work with what you got, right?

And so I did that.

I am no ass shaking, video chick by any stretch of the imagination (although that would be an awesome side job to be with rappers making it rain with the benjamins), but I look at these beautiful women (well, most of them are beautiful) with toned, thunder thighs and booties in these videos and I think, “what am I complaining about?” These women capitalize off their curves! I need to start embracing my thickness…

I took charge. My workouts, my cardio…all these have done wonders for my thighs AND my ass. I’m not in perfect shape, but I’m doing my best to mold, and stretch and tone out these problem areas. My thighs don’t even rub together anymore…now that’s an accomplishment in itself! Is my body in the condition I want it to be in?

Nope.

But I’m getting there.

Dumps like a truck? Not yet

Thighs like what? Not yet

Embracing and accepting my thickness….I’m there.

(I’ll let you know when I can crack a walnut with my ass cheeks)

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