Sexy Mother Packer

I confess.

I'm a serial over packer.

I will take EVERYTHING I can and pack it... 'JUST IN CASE'.


That's my excuse everytime..

Charlie: Why are you packing shampoo? They have it at the hotel.
Me: Just in case

Charlie: You're bringing a blow dryer, too?
Me: Just in case
Charlie: And... 10 pairs of panties?
Me: Just in case
Charlie: Do you really think you need all those shoes? We are only going to be gone for the weekend!
Me: Just in case
Charlie: And...the fur-lined parka & snowboots?? It's Arizona and 100 degrees outside...
Me: Just in case!

I can't help it. I like to be prepared!

My husband's mantra is, "...just buy it when you get there.."
He can fit a whole year's wardrobe into a Nike carry-on bag and be fine with it.
Me, on the otherhand, need a forklift to help me hoist all the heavy luggage for a weekend trip to San Diego.

It's gotten even worse now that I have kids...

Charlie: Why are you packing 6 toothbrushes? We only have 2 kids.
Me: Just in case
Charlie: Do you really think they need 3 pairs of pajamas and all this underwear?
Me: *sigh* Just in case!
Charlie: We are only going to be gone for 2 days. What's with the sweaters, ski masks and 5 pairs of jeans for each of them?!
Me: *roll my eyes*..Just in case
Charle: And stuffed animals, coloring books, a DVD player and the Barbie apartment/condo? Do they really need all this stuff?
Me: Just in case!!!

By the time I've packed everything but the kitchen sink, I've managed to load up 4 suitcases and 2 duffel bags. And I know, nine times out of ten, I really only use a quarter of what I brought. But, hey...I am always prepared! Why buy it when you have it at home? (Or in my case, in your suitcase?!)

What also changes when you become a mother is your handbag.

Oh, the lovely little handbag metamorphasizes into 5x's it's size when you have kids. You no longer have the cute little clutch..you now have the 'mom purse'..ouch!

I remember how cute my 'pre-mom' bag was..it was like yesterday...

It was the cutest little Louis Vuitton handbag with a matching coin purse and wallet. I loved that bag and the contents inside:

- Dior compact with rosy lip gloss
-Matching Louis Vuitton check book holder with pen
-Chanel blush
-Leather business card holder
-Cell phone neatly placed in the inside pocket
-Tiffany heart keyring with a few keys
-Concert tickets
-Brush
-Mint Gum
-Chanel perfume
-Dior sunglasses

And then.... it all changed after I shot my offspring out my birth cannon....
My cute little handbag turned into a monstrous, Mary Poppins, bottomless, pit of a purse overnight.

I now lug around the handbag from hell.

Let's take inventory, shall we?

- Dior compact w/ a broken mirror and smudged gloss
- Receipts
- Check book is now unbalanced and bent with pages folded over
- Receipts
- An unopened Capri Sun drink with a missing straw
- Receipts
- 3 different packs of gum with only one stick left in each pack
- Receipts
- A lollipop with crumbs and a paperclip stuck to it
- Receipts
- Movie ticket stubs from Hannah Montana
- Receipts
- Chuck E. Cheese tokens
- Receipts
- Cellphone with fingerprints and a sticker on the back
- Receipts
- Expired coupons
- Receipts

- A Polly Pocket shoe and skirt

- Receipts

- Polly Pocket's head (yes, just her head)

- Receipts
- Free panty coupon for Victoria's Secret that expired last Christmas
- Receipts

- Restaurant crayons with only 2 in the pack

- Receipts

- A rock

- Receipts

- A broken hair clip

- Receipts

- High School Musical lip gloss w/ Corbin Bleu scratched off because he's 'ugly'

- Receipts
- Recipe that I ripped out of a magazine at the dentist's office..last year
- Tampons
- Receipts
- Advil
- Receipts
- Camera to record all the kids' special moments (as soon as I erase the full memory stick)
- Receipts
- Hand sanitizer stuck to an appointment card for my gynecologist (that I forgot about)
- Receipts
- 3 packs of Spongebob Fruit snacks

I find it quite humorous as I take inventory. Wow..has my life changed. But I savor every minute of it.

And yet... it's kinda sad.

I know that before long, my babies will be all grown up and my huge, monstrous purse will slowing change back into the small handbag it once was... but for now, I will continue to immerse myself into the joys of motherhood...and hang on to the Chuck E. Cheese tokens...

JUST IN CASE :)

The Ghosts of Boyfriends Past...

"Maybe the past is like an anchor holding us back. Maybe... you have to let go of who you were to become who you will be...." Carrie Bradshaw, Sex in the City


Boyfriends.
Do I have any regrets about my past or who I've dated?
Absolutely not.

Do I sometimes question the decisions I've made when it came to the colorful personalities that I've have shared my life with?
Absolutely.

I know that God brings people in and out of our lives for a reason. And I've taken away so much from each relationship. I have learned a lot about myself and about life from each and every one of them. Although I don't mention every single guy I've dated in this blog (please don't take offense), you've all made an impact on my in some way, shape or form. I've learned how much my soul can tolerate and how much my heart can forgive.

To all the Ghosts of Boyfriends Past, I'd like to thank you...

D.R.: You were my very first boyfriend in 8th grade. You were the first to hold my hand and you were my first kiss. In junior high, when I was going through my 'ugly duckling' stage, you thought I was cute and it really boosted my self confidence that a popular boy like you found a goofy, clumsy girl like me attractive. But then you decided to 'cheat' on me with Veronica because she let you feel her boobies and go down her Jordache jeans. I was crushed. But I want to thank you. Thank you for bringing out the stronger side of me at such an early age. It felt good to know that I could make wise decisions and stand up for myself and not give in the pressures of intimacy at such an early age.


E.A.: We were together for 2 whole weeks in junior high. That's equivalent to a year in real life ;) You had the best handwriting, you were smart, funny and brought out the intellectual side of me. Thank you for helping me overcome my fear of revealing the "smart " side of myself instead of hiding it for fear of being classified as a nerd. I still have the love notes you sent me and will always cherish them. And now you're in heaven, your life taken too early. Miss you lots, Eddie.

D.S.: You were my first car date. You were the first one my mom let me stay out with until 10 p.m. You respected me and you never tried anything inappropriate. You were on the baseball team and had your head on straight. You had the Suzuki Samurai that screamed 'chick magnet'. You gave me all your attention and I think I took advantage of that. I want to apologize for being such a spoiled brat to you in high school. I want to apologize for breaking up with you and believeing your "friend" who told me that you were seeing other people behind my back when you really weren't. I didn't realize he had other motives. I will forever carry around the guilt and I am truly sorry. I know that you and I remained friends afterwards but I don't remember why we grew apart- it was probably my fault. But I want to Thank you. Thank you for showing me that guys in high school can still be gentlemen and loving without expectation of a physical nature. Thank you for bringing out the laughter in me.

B.G.: I had a crush on you in 11th grade, but we technically never dated. You were a baseball player, cute and always flirted with me and so I thought there was a chance for us. When i finally revealed my true feelings to you, you crushed me by telling me you had a girlfriend that attended a different school. WTF? You never, ever mentioned a girlfriend before. I felt like the biggest loser, And when things didn't pan out with her, you tried to get with me. But it was a little too late. THEN...I find out (22 years later) that you lied to me about my boyfriend (D.S.) cheating on me. You lied just to get me to break up with him. I don't think I will ever forgive you for that. I lost a very special person in my life because of you and I will always carry around the guilt for hurting him. Yet, still..I want to thank you. Thank you for keeping me grounded and bringing me to the realization that life isn't fair and that it goes on with or without me and my broken heart. A harsh reality to swallow at 16.

M.O.: Took you to my prom, dated for over a year and thought things were 'ok'. It was the 'football-player-meets-thug' swagger you had, that attracted me to you. Or maybe it was your cockiness that fascinated me. And there were some things that I thought I could change about you, and I tried. I thought that if could just change those 'little things', our relationship would be perfect. As I graduated, we grew apart...naturally. For the record, I never cheated on you. What I am guilty of, is knowing in my heart that it was over between us and not being upfront about it. Thank you for helping me learn that I cannot change anybody. I cannot 'fix' people or go into relationships thinking that this person will change for me. I either accept them for who they are or move on.

F.L.: When writing this blog, i told myself that I wasn't going to bash anyone. But with you, i will make an exception. I wish I could say one nice thing about you, but I can't. It's taking all I have in me not to mention your name. I don't know what i was thinking when I met you. Maybe it was the 'bad boy' image that created the excitement of being with you. I strayed from my norm and took a chance with you. Being an adult woman, i thought I knew what I was getting myself into. I thought I knew better. I never expected our relationship to be such an abortion. You tore away at my soul until there was nothing left of me. My spirit was drained and replaced with such negative energy and hurt. Your controlling ways brought out your demented world of insecurities and your physical abuse revealed the coward in you. You cheated, you lied and you blamed the world for your situation instead of looking within. I didn't like myself when i was with you. I actually loathed the person I saw in the mirror. I wasn't the happy, go-lucky girl that everyone knew. I had transformed into this sad, empty shell of a human being. I alienated my best friend and my family when I was involved with you. They couldn't bare to see what I was putting myself through for you. But I didn't listen. They loved me enough to let me follow my own path, but stayed right behind me to catch me when I fell. I didn't want to face the reality that they were right about you. I was your arm candy. That's all I was. Delusional, you were. But...I started to fight back, and you didn't like that. I started to place you in the backseat of my life, and you didn't like that. I started to regain my confidence to leave you, and you didn't like that. But-- I want to thank you. Yes, I want to thank you for testing my faith and my unwillingness to give up on myself and my future. I want to thank you for showing me that I was stronger than I thought I was and that I could fight my way back and become whole again. I want to thank you for forcing me to find my own wings and fly away. And...I also want you to know that I forgave you a long time ago. I knew I came to a crossroads in my life when I was able to forgive you and find closure. You need God, I hope you find Him one day, as I know you have a lot of free time in prison.


The Ghosts of Boyfriends Past will always remain a part of me. I wouldn't be the woman I am today making unusual efforts to succeed without the life experiences of Boyfriends Past.


No regrets. Just lessons.